When I found out about the Olympics last week I was excited but didn’t feel anywhere near the emotions I felt the first time I was named four years ago. This was partly because the first time around I had already come to terms with not being named and wasn’t expecting the call at all (I was added as an alternate after they initially named the team). The second reason is that I have the tendency to ‘doomsday’ events which essentially means whenever I get exciting news or am looking forward to something I immediately think about all the things that could go wrong. For example, when I called my mom to tell her, I told her I was worried they were going to change their mind or take it away from me even though when the US Ski Team Athlete Director called me he said “congratulations you’re named to the Olympic team.” Not much ambiguity in that statement.
I didn’t know ‘doomsdaying’ was an actual thing, until I read Brene Brown’s book Dare to Lead where she discusses our tendency to do this. She says it’s a safety mechanism to prevent ourselves from getting hurt or embarrassed in the future. But, she also said it’s extremely unhealthy because we should allow ourselves to feel all emotions to their full extent: to bask in the excitement, and be okay with feeling disappointment if something unforeseen happens. I think this is a really important lesson to be able to fully embrace the moment and everything it brings, and this is something I have been working really hard at this year.
There’s always the internal struggle of how to enjoy the moment and appreciate where I am while still trying to maintain the competitive mindset of putting my head down and focusing on the work that needs to be done. But I think I’ve begun to find a better balance of doing both at once.
When I look back at four years ago when I qualified for the 2018 Olympics I can’t help feeling tremendously proud of how far I’ve come. Four years ago I was so miserable. I cried almost every day that season feeling completely defeated, lonely, and directionless despite having some of my best results. This year could not be more different. I’m still facing the same challenges and struggles and frustrations, but I’ve been able to handle each set back with growing determination and motivation. I think the biggest difference is I feel totally confident in my choice to be here. I also have learned to lean more on my support system, ask people for advice, reach out to friends when I’m down and keep looking for silver linings with the focus primarily on “how can I get better at skiing” rather than letting results totally dictate my emotions.
I wanted to share with all of you that I really am incredibly excited for the Olympics. I’ve said many times that this season wasn’t just about making the Olympics. It was about giving myself the opportunity to show myself how fast I could be on the World Cup and to continue to push myself to keep getting faster. And I really do mean this. But the Olympics will be a really incredible reward for a lot of hard work and I think it will be even more rewarding for me to share that with all of you.
Im looking forward to continuing to find the balance between appreciating the moment, while still working incredibly hard as I head to Beijing on the 2nd, but first I have one more World Cup speed weekend coming up in Garmisch. Wish me luck!
Congratulations, Tricia! I'm so excited for you and your family and am looking forward to sharing your inspiring journey and story with our community. It's such an incredible honor to have a HOMETOWN Olympian! Not many towns can say that in the United States. I had a great conversation with your mom today about your family's participation at the event in Evans on February 19th at Suncliff, which helped direct me to your blog. This is unbelievable news and we should be shouting it from the rooftops, especially in Evans, NY. So that is what I'm going to try to do. We'll be here watching and rooting for you in Evans, NY! Safe travels!
-Lisa LaRusso
Spectacular news and we are all excited for you and your family. Thank you for taking the time to share your experiences and thoughts. We will be cheering for you! - Carole, Bernie, George, Gen & Sean Crotty